If you’ve ever dreamed of a wedding that’s rich in tradition, symbolism, and deep emotional connection, then the San-San-Kudo sake-sharing ritual is likely one you’ve heard of. Picture this: a serene, spiritual moment where the bride and groom exchange sips of sake, symbolizing their commitment not only to each other but to their families and ancestors. This isn’t just a quirky tradition—it’s a beautiful, centuries-old custom that holds profound significance in Japanese weddings.
But what does it really mean? And how can you bring this captivating ritual into your own wedding, whether you’re planning a destination wedding in Japan or infusing your ceremony with a touch of Japanese culture? Let’s dive into the story behind San-San-Kudo and discover how it can add a special layer to your celebration.
What is San-San-Kudo?
Let’s break it down: San-San-Kudo literally translates to “three-three-nine,” a reference to the three cups of sake involved in the ritual and the nine sips that are taken during the ceremony. But don’t be fooled—this is more than just a drinking game. The ritual is an ancient Japanese tradition, deeply rooted in Shinto beliefs and customs.
The ritual takes place during the wedding ceremony, where the bride and groom each sip from three cups of sake. The cups are arranged in a circle, symbolizing unity and balance. As the couple takes turns sipping from these cups, they are performing a deeply symbolic act of connection, purification, and commitment.
The Symbolism Behind the Three Sips
Now, let’s get into the meaning behind this beautiful custom. So, what’s with the number three? And why do the couple and their families sip from the same cups? Here’s the breakdown:
1. Three Sips – Balance, Harmony, and Unity
In Japanese culture, the number three is considered a symbol of balance, completeness, and harmony. It represents the union of two distinct individuals—yet it’s also a reflection of the couple’s merging of their hearts, minds, and souls. Three sips signify not just the joining of two lives but a harmonious balance of love, respect, and support.
2. The Bride and Groom’s Sips – Equality and Respect
The first sip is taken by the groom, followed by the bride. This exchange symbolizes the equality of the couple within their marriage. While the groom begins, the bride’s turn is just as important, representing the balance of power, support, and respect in their relationship. It’s a lovely reminder that a healthy marriage is built on equality and shared values.
3. The Couple’s Parents – A Family’s Blessing
After the couple shares their first round of sake, it’s time for the parents to participate. Each family takes a sip from the same cups as a gesture of unity. This act symbolizes the joining not only of the bride and groom but also of their families. It’s a beautiful reminder that a marriage isn’t just about two people—it’s about the bond that connects their families and their shared support for the couple’s future.
4. The Nine Sips – A Blessing for Eternity
In Japanese numerology, the number nine represents eternity and longevity. By completing the ritual with nine sips (three sips from each of the three cups), the couple is not just uniting in the present, but they’re also receiving a blessing for an enduring, everlasting love. It’s as if the act itself carries the weight of time, ensuring that the couple’s bond will stand the test of it.
5. The Sake – Purification and Blessing
Sake isn’t just a drink—it’s sacred in Japanese culture. Traditionally used in Shinto rituals, sake represents purification, spiritual cleansing, and a divine blessing. By drinking from these cups, the couple is not only sealing their commitment to each other but also invoking blessings from their ancestors, ensuring that their union is sacred and enduring.
How San-San-Kudo Fits Into Modern Weddings
While the San-San-Kudo ritual is deeply rooted in tradition, many couples are incorporating it into modern weddings, whether they’re getting married in Japan or at home. From custom sake cups to personal twists on the ceremony, the ritual can easily be adapted to fit your unique style.
1. The Venue – A Perfect Setting for a Sacred Moment
If you’re marrying in Japan, consider holding your ceremony in a traditional Shinto shrine or a beautiful garden to create the perfect backdrop for this sacred ritual. Venues like Meiji Shrine in Tokyo or Kiyomizu-dera Temple in Kyoto are popular choices for couples looking to honor this tradition in an authentic setting. You can find more information about Meiji Shrine here. These locations offer a serene, sacred space that elevates the significance of the ceremony.
2. Customizing the Sake Cups – Add a Personal Touch
Traditionally, the sake cups used in San-San-Kudo are made of wood or ceramic. But why not put your personal spin on it? Custom-designed cups can add a meaningful touch to the ceremony, whether you choose to have your initials, wedding date, or a unique design engraved on them. Custom cups not only reflect your style but also make the moment even more memorable.
3. Involving Your Loved Ones
The beauty of San-San-Kudo is that it’s not just for the couple—it’s a family affair. You can involve your parents, siblings, or close relatives by having them participate in the sake-sharing ritual. By inviting loved ones to partake, you’re symbolizing the unity and support of both families as they come together to celebrate your marriage.
4. A Modern Twist – Adapting the Ritual
If you’re not having a traditional Japanese wedding but still want to include elements of the San-San-Kudo ritual, you can adapt it to your own style. For instance, you could introduce a wine or champagne toast instead of sake for a modern touch. Or perhaps share the ritual with your closest friends, inviting them to sip from the cups as a way of involving your inner circle in the ceremony.
How to Include San-San-Kudo in Your Wedding
Incorporating the San-San-Kudo into your wedding is simpler than you might think. Here are some steps to help you include this beautiful tradition:
-
Find a Shinto Priest: If you’re having a traditional wedding in Japan, a Shinto priest (or priestess) will guide you through the San-San-Kudo ritual. Many wedding venues in Japan offer packages that include this ceremony.
-
Select the Right Venue: If you’re tying the knot in a Japanese shrine or garden, check out venues like Rikugien Garden in Tokyo for a traditional setting. They often have packages for couples who want to incorporate local wedding customs. You can learn more about Rikugien here.
-
Personalize the Experience: Custom sake cups or unique variations of the ritual can make the ceremony more personal. Don’t be afraid to add a modern touch while maintaining the heart of the tradition.
-
Get Creative with the Toast: If you’re not having a full traditional wedding, a simpler version of the ritual (perhaps just between the couple or with close friends) can be a fun and meaningful way to honor the tradition.
Wrapping Up
The San-San-Kudo sake-sharing ritual is a beautiful way to incorporate culture, tradition, and meaningful symbolism into your wedding. Whether you’re celebrating in Japan or introducing this practice to a more contemporary wedding, this ritual can be a moving way to unite with your partner and your families.
As a wedding photographer, I’ve had the privilege of capturing such special moments during weddings—moments that go beyond just a photograph but are stories of love, tradition, and family. If you’re planning your dream wedding and want to make sure every sacred moment is perfectly captured, I would love to help. Visit my portfolio for inspiration, and let’s discuss how we can work together to make your wedding day unforgettable.
Explore my investment packages to find the perfect photography package for your wedding, and don’t hesitate to contact me if you have any questions. Let’s make your happy moments truly timeless!
